A Transformative Ritual For Disappointment

So, you failed. Or, you feel like you did anyway. "It" didn't work. The house, the job, the creation, the relationship—whatever "it" was didn't pan out. Not even close.I don't need to tell you what I'm disappointed about for you to know what I mean. We know what I'm talking about. Sometimes no matter how much effort we've expended in our quest for [fill in the blank here], Life doesn't give us what we thought we wanted. That's the rub actually.

Being in the flow of Life (Source Energy, Universe, Love) doesn't mean we always get what we think we want.

It means we flow with what Life wants for us. And this is usually way better than we can imagine with our human mind. Knowing this truth doesn't take away our feelings of disappointment and sadness when our hard work, relationship, or dream doesn't turn out how we wanted. In the recent past I might have:

  • deemed it another failed attempt

  • jumped right into the next thing without pause

  • felt sorry for myself as a victim of circumstance

  • spent days contemplating whether I should give up my dream (consulting intuitives, tarot spreads, and friends and family)

  • obsessed on how to right what went wrong

  • or, felt ashamed for feeling sad in the first place (if I had more faith in the Universe I wouldn't feel disappointed.)

Today I chose differently. I created a short and sweet ritual to honor my work, to acknowledge what needs to be acknowledged, to show gratitude, and to release this disappointment (at least a little) so I could move forward with more peace and less shame.Rituals bring our attention and intention together, helping us transform, shift, or move stuck energy. A ritual gives us something tangible to connect to when we're wrapped up in our head or in our feelings. It's a creative act that connects us to the creative energy of the Universe.

A Transformative Ritual for Disappointment:

  1. Find a quiet moment for yourself.

  2. Grab a piece of paper and pen.

  3. Get clear on what you're disappointed about. Allow yourself to sit for a moment and just feel it.

  4. When you're ready, fill in these prompts:

    1. I honor and celebrate...[there is learning and growth even when things don't work out]

    2. I acknowledge...[we always play a part in how things work out, here's where we can be responsible for our part, or declare how we truly feel]

    3. I am grateful for...[another place to shift our perspective and honor something Life provides]

    4. I learned...[this is where the transformation takes place]

    5. I will...[you can declare your recommitment, release, or intention here]

  5. Say a little blessing for all the time, effort, energy, creativity, learning, and growth that you experienced as well as the sadness, disappointment, and loss you felt.

  6. Grab a match and safely light your paper on fire (I chose to do this in my sink). Watch the fire take your offering and declarations, sending a message of transformation to the Universe and to your heart.

Change is always happening and Life continues to grow us.Wishing we had done things differently or that things had ended differently is simply more information for next time. The trick is to honor your feelings as well as your learning process so you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and begin again.Right now is "that next time."  When we transform our disappointment we get to begin again with innocence.

Mindfulness, Rituals, TransformationJennifer Gallucci